Please Explain

I’m going to start doing a video blog and I will answer all of the questions that everyone has about everything. Soon. Ish.

Do you want me to throw you in a shark?

Okay, this is a little more complicated. First of all please go out and listen to the podcast KEXP song of the day. You listen to a song a day. It’s that simple. Folks, it makes me happy. So I heard a song on there by Dark Time Sunshine, “Run”. At the end of the song there is a kid laying down some threats that are clearly awesome considering one of them is, “do you want me to throw you in a shark?” I forgot the song and was trying to google it.

It was a failed attempt. However, Top 3 results:

1. A Wikipedia entry for the show “The Mighty Boosh” with the quote, “The Boosh is loose and it’s coming at you like a shark with knees!”

2. First of all there is a website called aquarium-fishtalk.com. Second of all, this guy is trying to buy a tank for a shark. I hope he is also out there searching for the size cage he would need for a bear so that he can end once and for all the age-old question, Who would win in a fight, a shark or a bear?

3. I’m not even going to link to this, but on a site called Parent Dish, the question was submitted “Do you throw out your kid’s artwork?” and then referenced a drawing one kid made of a shark eating a diver. My answer: That’s a keeper. The rest of it is probably crap, kids are really lousy artists with no sense of perspective.

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Hyponatremia

Worried I might not be googling any more? Fear not!

Hyponatremia. A friend of mine was talking about the risk of this at the marathon. I googled it today to have the exact definition so that I could explain to people that it was this condition that necessitated me salting my Mac & Cheese.

#1 Hit: https://health.google.com/health/ref/Hyponatremia: Hyponatremia is a metabolic condition in which there is not enough sodium (salt) in the body fluids outside the cells.

Enough said. I’m fighting it though folks through forcing myself to salt such things as everything. I am the true hero.

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Mankini

I had some sense that this existed when I was referencing it but in my head it was a male two-piece. This is so much more disturbing and I’m sure I just blocked it out. There were a ton of Borat results which seem unnecessary. I will just leave you with this:

http://www.clothestopose.co.uk/mankini-thongs-9-c.asp Are they twins? I wish for it to be true…but it might just be photoshop toying with me.

MankiniAd11 300x233 Mankini

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Geargasm

Thought I might have coined this term. Nothin’ new under the sun though folks. What I did find in the top 3 were some hot three wheel motorcycles, a wonderful video where we meet the owners of Gear Gasm 3 wheeled motorcycles and the most boring whiny use of the url: geargasm.com you could imagine.

Top 3:

http://www.geargasmcycles.com/ Oh hello sexy ladies draped across 3-wheelers…

http://www.viddler.com/explore/carolinacruiser/videos/37/151.62/GearGasm/ Oh hello Linda Day…

http://geargasm.com Thumplex Bumpitron, chronicles of a musician we’ve never heard of and never will..why? Well probably because of his whiny kid and unsupportive wife. Damn ingrates.

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Gay Panda

In response to a friend thinking an Asian Bear was referencing pandas, I decided to find out if Pandas referenced Asian Bears.

Top 3 Links

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=gay%20panda Not convinced, but at least it includes the phrase “panda butt”

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=big+gay+panda Is this just an entry to take a dig at some guy named Dave?

http://queersunited.blogspot.com/2009/08/word-of-gay-panda-bear.html Yes, there is a picture of an Asian Cowboy.

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